Catching Up on Life

Sometimes, life feels like a heavy weight on my chest. A weight that I just can’t shake no matter what I do. It feels like I’m trying to catch up to this invisible expectation I’ve put upon myself. An expectation that has no true end to it and the pressure is insurmountable.

All of that to say, lately, life has felt like a game of catch up. And I don’t know what I’m trying to catch up to. Perhaps its the lives of other people with whom I compare myself with? Like my parent’s who had me at 22 and had their first house at the same age. Or perhaps it’s my friends who share all of these stories and pictures of memories they’ve made. In comparison, it all makes my life seem so small and insignificant.

What a load of shit that is - and I say that in the nicest way, not to just you but myself as well. I can spend all the time in the world I have left sulking about how I didn’t get my first house yet, or that I chose not to go to the beach that day and missed out on a memory with my friends - didn’t pursue that Etsy business or my blog any sooner. And while it might be true that I missed out on things in life, the important thing to make note of is how much more I’ll miss out on just by having this mindset.

I’m not here to tell you to go out and take massive risks with not just your life and money, but maybe keep this in mind : Life is and always will be what we make of it. While we cannot control everything that happens to us in life, we can certainly control how we react to those things. We can also control how much effort we are willing to put into the projects and adventures we pursue.

That being said, don’t hold yourself back.

I did that too often in the past nine years. I stayed home when I could have gone out, just because I was nervous or anxious feeling about how the world would perceive me. But if there’s something I’ve learned, it’s that no one really gives a shit. It takes time to learn that - to truly feel that way about things. Most of us who are afraid of being judged, judge people a lot ourselves. And so naturally, we imagine everyone else is doing the same. The beauty of it? You’ll never know.

Go out and try that new coffee shop. Drive around and learn the area, see what’s going on! Compliment that person on their piercings or their clothes. Hold the door open for the person behind you. Exist. Because we only get to exist once. So make that existence fun and memorable for you. Make it worth your time. And don’t worry so much about other people.

Everyone is playing their own little game of catch up. And most of us are too focused on it to worry about how others look, if they tripped, maybe even spilled something on themselves. So just go on and live how you want to live. Stop thinking about living and do it.

And remember this too - life is easy to fake online and on social media. So stop wondering why their relationship looks happier, or why this one looks like they have their life together. Most of us don’t. Couples fight. Houses are messy and not every paycheck is sufficient. Life comes in waves and not every wave is the same.

Sometimes, life can feel like a heavy weight. But you don’t have to let it weigh you down. If it’s too heavy, put it down and start over. Take some weights off, approach it at a different angle - whatever you need to do to make it work.

Until next time.